"Undiedrawers"

In the past few months I have shopped for underwear at least three times. I'm not talking fancy, special edition panties either. Just plain ol' undiedrawers. Fruit of the Loom. White wonders. I have been less than impressed with the Charlottesville Wal-Mart for many reasons, but the fact that I have sought out regular women's underwear in a common size and style on multiple occasions to no avail had just about gotten my goat. Finally they stocked my FTLs, but wouldn't you know it, they were only available in a 3-pack. A three-pack!? What the heck? A woman who buys white Fruit of the Looms is generally the stock-up-for-a-year-or-two type. She is probably shopping for undies because her too-stained-or-holey-to-wear-in-case-of-an-accident ones are beginning to outnumber her decent ones. She's not looking to buy a meager three pair. She's overhauling her panty drawer! If they sold underwear in large packs at Sam's, she'd probably cut to the chase and buy them in bulk. That way, when the inevitable pesky stains happen, she could just toss a pair as necessary without guilt rather than go to all that annoying stain removal effort. THREE? I could not believe I had to buy a 3-pack of underwear. I never knew it mattered to me. I just took for granted that plain white standard underwear come in packs sized to carry you at least through the work-week. If you want fancy, go spend seven bucks a pair at Victoria's Secret and feel fancy all day long. I clean poopy diapers and dirty dishes and vacuum up dehydrated peas and such off my daughter's splat mat every day. I don't need fancy underwear riding up my butt crack. I don't understand how having a wedgy all day makes women feel sexy and alluring and ready to hop in the sack at the end of a long work day (no matter what kind of work). I'm just too practical I guess. I digress.

Anyway, so later at home I take out my scanty panty pack to put them in the laundry basket only to discover (as I shake my head in disbelief that I have only three new pair of panties after all these months of searching) that the individual little panty roll-ups are each taped! TAPED!? After roughly ten years of buying and laundering my own panties, I can honestly say I have never had to peel tape off of every single pair before tossing them into the wash. Unbelievable. Maybe that's why they only put three to a pack now. If you bought five at a time, you would be so mad at Fruit of the Loom for how long it takes to untape them that you'd surely cross over to Hanes Her Way.