Not a Fanilow

Oprah is apparently doing a "Wildest Dreams" season. It began on Monday with a car give-away. Every person in the audience received a brand new Nissan G6, fresh from Detroit. (Oprah went there herself to watch production.) Something like 275 cars were hidden on her employee parking lot with red bows and everything. It was unbelievable. I thought these people would literally pass out after they each opened their little gift box to discover that EVERYONE had the winning key. Oprah was, of course, thrilled with their reactions. I admit it was exciting even for me. One woman was there because she had written Oprah to express her dream just to attend a taping of the Oprah Winfrey Show and meet Oprah. Oprah did her one better and gave her a car to boot! This sweet woman just cried buckets of tears of joy. I was so happy for her!

Later, I found myself thinking, "If Oprah could grant me a wish, what would I want it to be?" I mean, she does incredible things for people all the time. I was at a loss. There isn't a single celebrity that I would just LOVE to meet in person or anything. While a wad of money would be nice, I can live without it. A house fully loaded with all my dream appliances and furniture would be incredible, but I don't even know where we will put down roots yet. Ginger and I can't have Oprah buy us houses next door to each other for the same reason. I guess most of my dreams have already come true.

So today she did another Dream Come True episode. The audience consisted of Fanilows. Yep, these women were all there because they begged Oprah to help them meet Barry Manilow. If that is the most they could want in life, then...I don't know what. What is the appeal of Barry Manilow? I have never understood it. Am I missing something? I mean, come on. It can't be that women actually think the man is sexy, can it?!? Really? His hair-do is inexplicable! His nose is, well, like that! He doesn't strike me as someone you would want to see without a shirt. It's Barry Manilow! It's like these women have some foggy spot on the part of their brains that controls sex appeal! So maybe it's not that. Maybe it's his talent as a singer/songwriter. I know some people really enjoy sappy lyrics, and he is the king of that. But is that enough to make women swoon? Really!? I guess you had to be there. Maybe I'm just too young to get it. But some of these women looked pretty young. They had to have been kids during Manilow's chart-topping years. (And I'm not thinking he was all that attractive even in his day, but I won't get on that again...) Now he's just another pretty voice singing sappily on easy listening stations featuring old Phil Collins songs. I just don't get it.