Life Lessons on Faith

I've probably heard this song before, but I think I heard it today for the first time. The kind of thing where you find yourself hearing something and thinking "YES!" after every statement. Its lyrics struck me, as the thick fog of a specific category of uncertainty and fear is just beginning to lift for me. Here's my abbreviated version...just the parts that mattered to me and minus the Biblical analogy about water and wine that I think is used backwards throughout the whole song...

Drive
by Incubus

Sometimes, I feel the fear of uncertainty stinging clear.
And I can't help but ask myself how much I'll let the fear take the wheel and steer.
It's driven me before, and it seems to have a vague, haunting mass appeal.
But lately I am beginning to find that I should be the one behind the wheel.

It's driven me before and it seems to be the way that everyone else gets around.

But lately I'm beginning to find that when I drive myself my light is found.

Whatever tomorrow brings, I'll be there with open arms and open eyes.
Whatever tomorrow brings, I'll be there.

There are some holes, like the fact that I shouldn't be the one "driving" either. That's where my lessons in faith come in for the umpteenth time. But it's just a song...and I get the point for me. If I take the reigns from Fear, then I might finally feel my Light...in every sense of the word.

Childhood Saturdays

I just ran across a website detailing the Saturday morning cartoons of my childhood. It was fun to remember all the shows I routinely watched--Fat Albert, Heathcliff, Flintstones, Smurfs, Shirt Tales, Pac Man, Muppet Babies, and in later years Pee Wee's Playhouse, Out of this World, and Small Wonder--and those that I had totally forgotten about--The Wuzzles, Monchichis, Get Along Gang, Snorks... A little stroll down memory lane.

I remember getting up earlier than everyone in my family and turning on the TV all by myself, switching channels until I found the Flintstones or Smurfs. And later my mom would find me sitting there all alone in the dark of pre-dawn with my knees pulled to my chest and my nightgown stretched over my legs, just contently and quietly watching cartoons.

I remember going with Mom sometimes to the beauty shop and being allowed to hang out in the break room to watch cartoons during her long stay there. I loved that option because it meant I was free to sneak sugar cubes at will, and no one seemed to notice. Sugar cubes were just so novel! I can't imagine sucking down pure sugar at 8am now. Sick!

I remember one Saturday (or was it many?) watching Fat Albert and Heathcliff while sitting at the edge of the kitchen flooring (must have been after the new carpet was installed in the living room) eating Jack n Jill donuts my dad had gotten for us while we were out and about together after dropping Mom off at the beauty shop. Mmmm...Jack n Jill!

My favorite thing to do on Saturday mornings was go with Dad to Ira's, a little breakfast diner on Waco Drive. They had little tiny juke boxes on the tables that you could play for only a dime, and Dad would let me choose a song. "The Chair" by George Strait is one I remember selecting one Saturday because it was Missy's favorite at the time, and whatever big sisters like is automatically cool. I can't remember Missy being there with us (I guess she was sleeping in); it seems like it was usually just Dad and me. I have always shared my Dad's love of big breakfast, so I was always excited when he took me to Ira's. It was almost like our own little Father-Daughter dates, and even though I'm sure it didn't happen all that often, our little jaunts to Ira's together are favorite memories.